40 common phrases of a nurse

Nurses tend to say the same things over and over again. Whether it is to patients or coworkers, they can say the same things from shift to shift, day to day.

Here are just a few of the most common phrases that come out of a nurse’s mouth on a frequent basis. See if you can find yourself in some of them, and leave your favorites in the comments!

1. I’ll get that for you.

2. So, your pain is 10/10?

3. Can I help you?

4. No, you aren’t bothering me, ma’am.

5. Can I please have the same assignment I had yesterday?

6. She called out again?

7. You want me to take how many patients?

8. I swear these shoes are going to kill me, no matter how expensive they are.

9. Oooo, donuts!

10. Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee.

11. I have to pee so bad, but I still have to finish this med pass.

12. I can’t go to lunch because two patients need wound changes, and I have new orders on another one.

13. Can someone help me pull this patient up in bed?

14. God, my back hurts so much!

15. But I did lift with my knees!

16. I hate calling that doctor because she can be such a jerk.

17. Why would anyone order a run of K without lido?

18. Wow, look at all the call bells.

19. Could you help me with this? Please?

20. The manager wants to see me. Again.

21. Yes, your family can visit after hours.

22. You want me to push the Dilaudid fast because it makes you feel better?

23. That object got into your anus by mistake?

24. No, I can’t bring sandwiches for your entire family.

25. No, ma’am, taking 12 tubes does not mean I took all of your blood.

26. I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to try to get the IV again.

27. So, you say you only had two beers tonight?

28. You don’t do street drugs, but you don’t want Narcan, either?

29. Why does everyone think patients sleep on nightshift?

30. Keepin’ ‘em alive until 7:05.

31. I need some help in here! Get the crash cart!

32. I can’t leave yet; I have charting to do.

33. We can’t work overtime, so I’m just going to punch out, and then finish my work.

34. Whoever designed this computer system never worked as a nurse.

35. Where did I put my brain sheets?

36. I lost my pen again.

37. Where the hell is my pill splitter?

38. I wish all of my patients were as pleasant as that lady in 23.

39. Pharmacy still hasn’t sent me my medications, and they were due three hours ago.

40. How many more hours until I get to go home?

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